Thankful

Yesterday was one of my absolute favorite holidays, Thanksgiving. The table was overflowing with turkey, potatoes, sauces, ham, corn, beans, and other staples. Faith, my beautiful neice, bounced on her mothers knee and giggled at her brothers obsession with pomegranate seeds. We all laughed and reminisced, ate and drank. It was perfect.

It wasn't until dessert time when Eliot started complaining about not liking apple pie (he doesn't like the sugar on top and would prefer to just eat raw apples - good boy!). I explained to him how lucky he is to have a piece of apple pie in front of him. How fortunate he is to have all of this food and family around him. We explained that there are some children in the world who are not as fortunate and this is why we give thanks - for all of our blessings. I think, for a 3 year old, he somewhat understood and said he was thankful and then took a bite of the pie.

Whether he understood or not, hearing myself say these things made me more thankful. I think we all lose sight of all we have. While it isn't the material things I'm thankful for it's the amazing family I have, the supportive and loving friends I have, and the incredible good food and wine we share together. I'm blessed. We all are.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Dear Life...

Dear Life,

You've been trying to get my attention and I've been out for the past two weeks enjoying late night dinners, cocktails and wine, concerts, and deep conversations with good friends and family. You've been trying to get me up to run and I've been laying in bed until 7am; reluctantly crawling out of my comfortable sheets to half ass a yoga sequence and mentally prepare for the day. You've been trying to get me to read literature and I've had my i-pod on a loud volume repeating The Decemberists, Rilo Kiley, Neko Case, Nina Simone, and others.

But I have to ask, isn't this all part of you? Since the marathon finished I've been on full speed ahead trying to catch up on the social experiences I had to miss out on while training. Well, I am tired now and I am listening to you.

I'm ready to think fully about my career. I'm ready to think fully about writing my book. I'm ready to think fully about organizing a food-sensory curriculum for schools or plotting my dream cafe's business plan. The funny thing is that these goals and realities never left the spotlight of my mind and heart - they simply just were not on the front burner. They are now, so do not worry.

So, Life, here is my proposal for this week: When I get back to Brooklyn today I'll do my grocery shopping and clean my apartment. I'll cook, watch movies, and do yoga all day. Tomorrow morning I'll run and get back on my schedule. I am a creature who thrives on routine and now I need to learn how to integrate my social life into my daily/weekly plan.

Life, no matter what anyone says, you are a good listener and I'm glad we had this little conversation.

Yours Truly,
Kendra

Food and Mood Link? I believe it...

I think this is a really interesting article published in the LA Times the other day.

While the report doesn't fully support the definite link between food and mood I think it does a fair job explaining the scientific end of it.

Take a read. What do you think?

Really, LX TV?

I woke up yesterday morning and felt like my body had just been through war. My ribs were killing me making it difficult to breathe and I had a slight fever. I ran the entire way Sunday and while I didn't reach my goal time (I made it in 5:14:48), I was very proud to not have walked AND I beat Jared from Subway.

But what I want to talk about was a segment I saw on LX NYC last night at 5pm. For those of you who do not know LX NYC is an hour long magazine news style show on NBC which took place of real news programming (it's basically a morning talk show in the evening). There was a segment about beating obesity with fat and it was sickening to watch.

The headlines sprawled out words and graphics about fruits and vegetables perhaps being the reason we are fat and shining light on the health benefits of red meats and fried food. I just about threw up while watching and was so disturbed at the composition of (mis) information and footage.

The piece was based around a book about obesity (I looked on their website and found it very difficult to navigate anything from their program) and while they did preach portion size (which is the only bonus) I felt that every bit of information was taking 5,000 steps back. Viewers/Consumers are confused enough with the abundance of information out there. We do not need to start believing that high fat foods and no exercise are the key to loosing weight. The last thing we need is someone telling us that fruits, vegetables, and exercise are making us fat! Are you kidding me?

I am not a health expert but I do my research and I work in media. I believe in book reviews, but do not preach their message. A line was crossed and while I'm kind of appalled, I hope others who saw it are too.

Thankfully the saving grace is when Sara Gore and her co-host both commented on not necessarily believing all of the information in the piece BUT saying portion size is very important for any intake. But seriously, who did that one get past?

Marathon Eve Ponderings

As I rode the N train back into Brooklyn tonight I gazed down the East River and spotted Lady Liberty. Her light reflecting in the evenings water and her strength standing strong against the cool fall air. There she was placed and there she remains, alone. I realized I felt lonely. I realized that I've been lonely for a while and, for now, I don't really mind.

Two nights ago I was waitressing at a book launch and had a rush of loneliness. It's a feeling reminiscent of my restaurant days which I actually used to love. My favorite was working on Sunday nights. We played jazz over the sound system, the ambiance was low and romantic. Couples and families swooned over deliciously rich meals, wine, and fine conversation. I remember watching them as I brought and cleared their plates and thought, "someday, I'll have that". Whatever "that" was and is.

So you may be wondering, "what the hell does this have to do with the NYC ING Marathon?". A lot, actually. Tomorrow I feel like I'm crossing a line. I will no longer be a non-marathoner, but a marathoner. It's like a right of passage into a community I've always admired. I can feel lonely all I want because when I'm on the road or trail nothing matters but me and the course ahead of me.

Today I met Bart Yasso at the Running Expo. I had just read about him and while we talked briefly about Lambertville, he signed my Runner's World Magazine. Tonight, while coming home from my pasta dinner with running friends, it hit me that he ran for loneliness too! A man who was always shunned by his father - he ran and pushed his body to ease the pain.

We are not so far off, Bart and I. While my parents always supported me, they won't be here tomorrow. Actually, none of my family will be here. Friends, yes, and thank God for them. But family, no, they have their own things going on (kids, church, etc).

So here I am. In less that 12 hours from now I'll be on my way to Staten Island. In less than 24 hours, I'll be a marathoner. I'm sure this sounds like a pitiful post, but I promise you it is not. I'm actually very content and very happy and very excited about this experience. Now, off to write my dedication miles!

Stand strong, Lady Liberty, stand strong.

Just a few more days...

It is so close I can taste it!

Against every urge to roll over and hit snooze for the 5th time this morning, I got my butt out of bed! After five sun salutations and some light yoga, I laced up those running shoes and zipped up the ol' rain coat. Rilo Kiley helped me through two rainy miles and when I got back to my house, I wanted to go back for more. I didn't. I held back, went inside stretched, ate a juicy orange, and got ready for the day.

I'm ready for this marathon! I'm scared to death, but I'm ready. I probably could have trained harder than I did, but it's too late to look back on that now. I have to keep moving forward and exercise the two most powerful muscles in my body: the heart and the brain. It is imperative for them to be on the same team.

There aint no backin' out now! November 7th will be a day I'll never forget. I keep saying I'll never run another marathon because the training is so grueling... but I take that back. I can't imagine my life without long, peaceful runs.

Focus and Faith

When we are ready, the message or lesson presents itself and we can embrace it.

Waking up this morning was difficult. I had a long, but wonderful weekend and it caught up to me. To bed at 9:30pm and awake at 7:30am. Instead of running, I needed yoga. I needed to breathe deep and be in silence.

When I opened my email I had a new message from Yoga Journal. The subject, Heart Healers. I cannot go on with what it was about but it was comforting and spoke directly to my soul.

I'm continuing to focus now. The marathon is in a few days and I've been great with running and nutrition. I'll put in a few miles this evening, so I'm not worried. Bottom line is this: I'm not going to beat myself up anymore. If I want that peace and positivity I've experienced in the past, I need to appreciate the struggle and doubt I'm in right now. The enlightenment will not be the same, it will be its own strength and understanding. Faith is what I have now. Focus and faith.